Now before you get any wrong ideas about who or what I walked out on, it most certainly wasn't my sweet hubby! I walked out of a movie! I have only walked out on one movie before in my life and that was Jackie Brown. Does anyone out there remember that movie? It was none other than Quentin Tarantino's freakish mind that was the creator behind this 1997 film. If you cannot tell already I am not a fan of his!
The story follows the main character, played by Pam Grier, a middle-aged African-American flight attendant who delivers gun money to some dealer. She then gets caught up in a brouhaha of murder, extortion and greed. Apparently there was like five hundred thousand dollars on the line. I guess the screenplay was based on Elmore Leonard's novel "Rum Punch!" Quentin Tarantino adapted the story to fit the "blaxploitation" genre.
Blaxploitation is a film genre that emerged in the United States in the early 1970s when many exploitation films were made specifically (and perhaps exclusively) for an audience of urban black people; the word itself is a portmanteau of the words "black" and "exploitation." Blaxploitation films were the first to feature soundtracks of funk and soul music. These films starred primarily black actors. Variety magazine credited Sweet Sweetback's Baadasssss Song with the invention of the blaxploitation genre. Others argue that the Hollywood-financed film Shaft is closer to being blaxploitation, and thus is more likely to have begun the genre.
Leonard was even an executive producer for the film. I have no idea how the movie ended because with all the N and F bombs dropped, I couldn't handle it and had to leave! I'm sure I wasn't quiet when I left. I was just so turned off and offended by this film I felt the need to let others know!
Don't bother clicking, you can't!
I even read that there is a Jackie Brown prequel in the works. No, say this isn't true? This prequel is from yet another Elmore Leonard novel called "The Switch". Well, this is one I won't be seeing, that's for sure!
Ok, on to the movie I walked out on. Drum roll please? Actually it needs no introduction, really!
Last night my hubby and I went on a date to see the move "Splice". We usually take turns on who picks the movie, so I knew I had to see whatever he picked! I hadn't even seen a preview so I really had no idea what was in store for me! Now I should have realized, when there were only 5 other people in the theatre on a Friday night, that should have given me some indication as to how the movie would be, right?
"Warning", spoilers are coming, so if you wish to see for yourself how awful this movie is, do not continue to read!
The movie starts with two Genetic engineers played by (Adrien Brody) who is known as Clive
and (Sarah Polley) who is known as Elsa.
They specialize in "splicing" together DNA from different animals to make a crossbreed creature. After they successfully do that, or so they thought, because that ended up in a blood bath with blood shooting out into the audience. No, it wasn't in 3-D, but maybe that would have made it more exciting! They thought they could then try their hand at combining human DNA with DNA from other animals. Elsa wanted to basically cure the world of cancer and thought this was the only way. Apparently the pharmaceutical company was no longer interested in funding this endeavor, so Elsa and Clive went on to do it in secret.
The result of doing their own secret experiment, which almost kills Elsa, is
Dren, which is Nerd spelled backwards!
The creature is on the left. Sorry for the small picture but if you look closely you will see a hairless bunny like creature with bird legs!
And this is what the creature grows into. A girl with chicken legs and wings! Wish you could see them!
Clive goes on to realize that Dren is really a part of Elsa. She is the human DNA used for this experience. He was furious but at the same time, a little excited! Can you say Yuck with a capital Y? Not that I wasn't already uncomfortable enough but when he started kissing the creature and then decided to have sex with her was when I rather loudly said, "Oh you've got to be kidding me?" Jim said, "Shhhh"! I of course couldn't and then proceeded to get up and said, "Oh I'm outta here!"
Look at the similarities between Dren and Brittany Spears. Creepy!
Well, that's it folks, we left never to know how it ends or frankly even care. I did have a nightmare about all the noises she was making when they were making it!
Ahhhhhhh, enough already! I want it all erased from my memory! Please whatever you do, even if its on t.v., don't ruin your brain cells with this crap. I am almost embarrassed for Adrien Brody for thinking this would be a wise choice for his career. In fact, if I were a betting kind of gal, I would say this might even ruin it! I sure hope he fires his manager and publicists and doesn't just jump into the next movie he's offered without thinking!
I think it might be a perfect time for me to crack open my Mother's Day gift, my Miller Lite!