Ok, so you might be thinking I'm talking about someone picking their nose, right? Wrong, I'm actually going to talk about Boobs! So last night we are sitting at the dinner table and we are all chatting about the day when, well, here goes the truth.
I dropped some food down my shirt! Lets just say it fell in my cleavage!
Well I dove right in to get it and that's when my son, James yells, "Ahhhhhh, she's digging for Gold! Mom stop that! My son is 10 and lately there has been some boobage on the minds of some fourth grade boys! Its no secret that I have some large girlfriends, I do! I try to run away from them but somehow they always seem to find me! My son freaks at the talk of boobs or the sight of them. No, I don't strut around in my birthday suit but if I stretch and I stick my arms up, then I guess my bresticles stick out! Well, James screams of course! And if I hug him he pushes me away and says, "Mom, your hmm, hmm's are in the way! I usually say, "Honey, they aren't going to attack you!"
Claire on the other hand loves to talk boobs! She hopes she has big boobs some day! I pray she does not but since she is related to me, I think it is inevitable! Thank the Lord I know a good doctor, lol! Then she can have them removed. She loves telling James that she is a girl and she gets to see mine whenever she wants to! James gets these really big eyes and says, "Ewwww, Mom, Claire doesn't need to see them, does she?"
As James and his dad proceeded to get ready for bed, Jim could tell something else was weighing on James' mind. He said, "What's up James?" James then asks his dad some rather personal questions. He asked if he had touched my breasts before. Thank God I was no where near that conversation. Jim believes in honesty and would rather have James know the truth about things then going and talking to his friends without knowing the facts. Oh God how I hope I don't come up as playground conversation today! Jim told him the truth and said, yes, that is what married people do. James of course made some awful groaning noises that I could hear from downstairs. I made no attempt to find out why he was making them and even hoped Jim wouldn't come and tell me! I wonder if he will remember this conversation some day and laugh at his reaction about boobs, because I'm sure he will have changed his mind about them, don't you?
I swear every day in my house is a test with these children. You have no idea what the discussion will be like from one moment to the next! Hmmm, I wonder what tonight's dinner conversation will be? Stayed tuned........
14 comments:
LOL! Too funny. I have big girls, too, but my boys never seemed to pay attention. Now my teen stepdaughter did open the door on me one time when I was getting dressed and her eyes about popped out of her head. She said, "your boobs are HUGE." LOL
You so cuhrazy! LOL. Man I am not looking forward to these conversations with my boys!
Great post, loved it! Kids, what are you gonna do? They always entertain us and then down the road you get grandkids and its even better. They go home at night ;0}
Take care, Sue
Megan,
I'm sitting here in PJ's and my coffee almost came flying out because of the laughter. You are the best dear friend. Well I hope you know that now when I arrive at the airport to see you one day my bra will be stuffed to the hilt cuz I don't want any boob envy going on during our visit. Love you sweet girl
xoxo
Kate
Oh my gosh I can relate. My husband has a half brother that I've only met once in the 14 years we've been together. Well his brother got into trouble & is in prison. I just had a huge conversation in length about this with my 4 year old. I couldn't lie to her about him, but geez - I didn't realize we'd have to talk about why you can't have a dog in prison!
I too have friends DD we call them the TWINS (lol) you are uber funny, my sweet friend turned me on to you... I think you know her Kate is her name. I hope you and your twins have a great day.
Smiles,
Sheila
You are to funny.... YES' your son will change his mind about boobs in another what... 3-4 years! My bella wants boobies too. HA! have a good one. Jenn
When we were on the beach in Hawaii my oldest daughter and I actually had the fake boob discussion. There was a woman there busting out of her suit with really big fake ones and she was with an old man. It was obvious the situation...anyway I explained how to tell if they were real or fake. Oh the important lessons we get to share with our younguns:)
Oh my gosh, you are hysterical! I can remember years ago we had neighbors and one of their little boys would see a womans boobs on TV and he would go up and touch them and say "bweasts"!
And as far as being well endowed goes, I am there, when I spill something it never goes any further than the girls as I like to call them.
xo
LeAnn
I can't tell you how funny this is! Booooobs! I used to wish I had them, now I don't want them! I only hope my daughters don't have big ones but I think my eldest will! Boyyyyzzz! Booooyzzz boyyyzzzz.....he's at the age where booobs are hot topic! Ut-Oh! Bubs! Bubs! (boobs)
You are too funny!
that was hilarious! your kids are sooo cute! have a great weekend. thanks for stopping by. verbena cottage
Oh Lordy, this is hysterical. Just when we think we've heard it all, right?!
Dear Megan
This is hilarious and does remind me of my mum when we were kids.. she had quite a substantial bust herself.. don't know what happened to me... haha You know at work once I was in the middle of giving a presentation to a group of colleagues and dropped my pen down my front.. it just stuck there in my bra.. well .. what to do.. excuse me.. fished it out... they all laughed... although one guy went a strange colour purple... hahaha.... thanks for these funny memories... you're a scream... catch you soon. xxx Julie
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