Tuesday, March 2, 2010
You all know what I am talking about. Jake has found his co-pilot and its Vienna! He called her his baby! Can you say baby barf? So how does his family really feel after he proposed to the former Hooters gal? He made a point of saying he needed for his future wife to get along with his family. He had told his family that he was in love with both girls and he needed help on deciding, or at least a second set of eyes to help make his decision. Jake knew his family would love Tenley, hands down. They thought she was perfect and would fit in wonderfully. Jake's mother said that the women are the glue that holds the family together. Basically you mean the girls wear the pants in the family, I got it!
When Jake told his family that Vienna did not get along with the other girls his mother said, "And you don't see that there could be something to that, Jake?" Jake was a little defensive towards his mother and actually a little nervous to have them meet her. He kept saying, "I want you to see what I see in her." Do you mean big boobs and the willingness to flaunt them all the time! I just want Vienna to go in and show them the girl that I have fallen in love with. Well Jake, if thats tacky, hostile and ditzy then she will make you proud! When his sister in-law Laura asked Vienna what makes her so different then all the other girls she said, "I'm brutally honest." She then asked if she got along with the girls and Vienna just giggled and stuffed pasta in her mouth and said, "not really." Remember that red flag his mother talked about? The best part was when his sister in-law Laura asked if Vienna thought she looked fat in her shirt and Vienna said, "sort of." Ahhhhhhhhhh, are you really that stupid? Even if it was in jest you lie like the wind!
When Laura and Lindsay asked Vienna what it was that she loved so much about Jake, she honestly could not answer. She just giggled and said, "He is cute, and he makes me a better person!" Yeh, Jake would make me a better person too, because I would run away so fast and never look back! It was obvious they did not like Vienna. There was no way she would fit in with them. I think the girls were loving letting Vienna run her mouth off about Tenley and saying how Tenley was like a robot and just didn't have any opinions about anything. I just loved it when his SIL said, "So won't you be shocked when he doesn't pick you?" Ha, Ha, Ha, I laughed so hard. It seemed that even Jake's brothers were not liking Vienna and said that her brutal honesty was just a defense mechanism. And then out of no where, I'm not sure if I dozed off, but, his mother all of a sudden hugged her and Laura got teary eyed and felt bad for judging her and said they think she will fit in fine with the family. What just happened? Did the producers feel that they were being too mean? Was there money involved?
Time for the 1 on 1 dates. And if you have seen the Bachelor I really mean 1 on top of 1. Yuck, Vienna and Jake rolling around in mud. Jake this is just a physical attraction you are feeling for Vienna. I mean what on earth could you possibly be talking about? The one stop light they just got in her town in Florida! And then when he is with Tenley on the boat and after they have kissed for the hundreth time he says, "Aren't you worried that the emotional chemistry is so hot but that the physical attraction isn't as hot? I don't mean sexual, I mean crazy, mad, passionate! Huh, isn't that the same Jake? Are you shaking your head too? Shocked, Tenley says, she feels it. I think Jake wants there to be something wrong or missing from Tenley so he springs that on her. I think Vienna just gets him hot and bothered more than Tenley. He is always commenting on how much he enjoys rolling around with her in the sand and mud and maybe because her boobs are bigger then Tenley's. But when Tenley has him alone in his room she says just for all of us to hear, ''Tonight is the night that I'm going to prove to Jake that our chemistry is real in every single way.'' Every single way? Are you thinking what I am thinking? So maybe Tenley isn't so innocent after all.
Well, good luck you two, I think that your lightening chemistry will wear off in a couple of weeks and Jake you will be right back where you started, looking for that perfect wife again, and Vienna will be back at Hooters showing off her hooters!
Remember Tenley saying, "Jake you will regret it and wish you had picked me!" Don't the gals that aren't picked always say that? And if it is true will she take him back? Oh wait a minute, who cares!
Now they have picked Allie for the upcoming Bachelorette. It's amazing how fast people can go in and out of love. Allie did you not sob like a baby that you regretted picking your job over Jake? Now you are a completely different person saying, "I was so shocked, I'm so excited, honored, flattered that they picked me!" That's it, I'm swearing off the future Bachelor and Bachelorettes. I seriously think some of my brain cells have died and now I feel bad because if you are reading this, so have a few of your brain cells!
I'm going to stick with reading, its much more interesting! Reading is like therapy to me and after watching the Bachelor last night I need a lot of therapy today. So I'm off to read to clear the gunk out of my head!